Opinion
This page offers articles of a humorous nature, opinion pieces, social and political commentaries, and even rants. If you're down for a laugh or hear a side this is the page to go to.
Enthusiastic Pledge Defaces Fintel
Written Joe Krzyston
Consumed with discernable purpose for the first time in his entire life, one freshman is on a mission to carve the letters...
Black History Month: Third Time’s The Charm
Written by Shamira James
Though it only lasts for one day, people associate the entire month of February with Valentine’s Day. While I love walking...
Alone in the Laundry: Why We’re Eating Soap
Written by Joe Krzyston
According to the Washington Post, the first two weeks of 2018 saw thirty-seven teenagers call poison control because they intentionally consumed...
California Dreaming in a Southern State of Mind
Written by Leilani Doneux
To admit that I was afraid, I would also have to admit that when I committed to Roanoke College, at a...
Stakes Not High Enough in Intro Fiction Story
Written by Joe Krzyston
The uneasiness was palpable in a Miller Hall classroom today as Bailey Mann’s short story was analyzed and picked apart for...
New Year Evolutions
Written by Isaac Davis
2018 is the year I’m: losing weight, learning French, working harder, getting better, running faster, saving this, sorting that, starting a...
Editor Fired for Gross Incompetance
Written by Joe Krzyston
Effective next issue, David Hall, longtime editor of the Roanoke College Brackety-Ack, will be fired from the paper for reasons related...
Let’s Say Something
Written by Emma Grosskopf
On a campus as small as ours, rumors spread like the plague, and it’s hard to gauge their source or their...
Avoid Hallmate Hookups
Written by Emma Grosskopf
When you put a bunch of 20-something year olds together on a small campus, you’re going to have some tension. Sexual...
Horan Concert Worth the Rainy Wait
Written by Jordan Hanson
When my roommate asked me if I wanted to go to a Niall Horan concert with her, I had no idea...
RC Rock Actually Just Golf Ball Covered in Paint
Joe Krzyston
Section Editor
One night shortly before break, Dear old Roanoke’s Underground Network for Knowledge and Sedition (DRUNKS, for short) tore a sheet of paint...
Sorority Absolved of Responsibility via Cornhole
Joe Krzyston
Section Editor
The young women of one of Roanoke College’s sororities (and because these organizations are preposterously well lawyered, that’s as specific as I’m...
The Big Reveal
Joe Krzyston
Section Editor
Despite some unseasonably warm weather earlier this month, Roanoke College is now, without a doubt, in the thick of autumn. The air is...
I’m Proud to Welcome Sisters into The Only Great Fraternity I Know
David Hall
Editor-in-Chief
Over the break, I enjoyed a beer with an old friend. I often like to see people from high school, catch up, trade...
Editorial: Shrubbery as an Act of Rebellion
Article by Joe Krzyston
For a brief, uncharacteristic moment, I’d like to give voice to a belief that I do not hold myself. I’d like...
The Fishwick Column
Article by Ben Vester
I often find myself paralyzed in intellectual discussion, unable to enhance the conversation with an insightful comment or a reasonable critique....
