Written by Emma Grosskopf
Back when I was an impressionable youth, I believed that horoscopes were a nonsensical idea: that the stars and lunar energy and Mars moving into my whatever-house.
Incidentally, my level of passion about this belief was apparently characteristic of my zodiac sign.
Huh.
As it would seem, so is stubbornness. And intensity. And loyalty.
Yup, I’m a Scorpio.
It might just be me, but I admit that it does have a little bit of cache, being the apparent mysterious, troubled, dominant sign. I used to giggle at people who put so much stock into the zodiac, but now I find myself looking at monthly horoscopes once in a while to see whether in the near future I’ll have to deal with a work conflict or meet a mysterious stranger or come randomly into money.
GUYS: IT’S SCORPIO SEASON.
I need everyone to batten down the hatches, secure their wigs and hold on tight. This season is BRINGING the emotions, and I really don’t think any of us are ready for it. This is the season for intensity, intimacy and introspection, and I’m here for it.
Whether you put any stock into the stars or not, this season Scorpios like me will most likely (and predictably) be insufferable.
The resident horoscope expert at our sister publication Cosmo, Jake Register, lets us know that Scorpios, while mostly known for their hypersexuality and vindictive, revenge-loving nature, are also born under the sign of rebirth. Our buddy Jake says that by the end of this intense season, something about us will be changed. Forever. Whether it’s our personality, our appearance or our relationships, something will be permanently changed, and we will move forward stronger than ever before.
I get if you believe horoscopes are hokum. I do. I, too, used to be small-minded without any vision.
But if, this Scorpio season, maybe some of y’all can get past the belief that horoscope predictions are just drivel written by people who like to make up nonsense to entertain the misguided masses.
Scorpios aren’t playing around, and neither is the energy this season.
Change is coming for us.