Written by Sarah Joseph
Just recently a girl I know told me she was struggling under the weight of everything she has going on and that she has overloaded herself, like a pack mule. That caught my attention. I began to look at the people around me: they were constantly stressed.
After all it is college right? But then I began to wonder: how many students have multiple jobs on campus? How many have social obligations that keep them away from school? Athletics? How many are taking more classes than necessary? Double majors or minors? Triple majors? How many students are taking on more and more, becoming pack mules struggling under the weight of their responsibilities? And, perhaps, more importantly why? Why spread yourself so thin that you can barely move?
One student, Kim McGinnis, junior, feels overwhelmed with how much is on her plate: “I feel like it affects my sleep schedule, in part because I am doing so many things as well as stressing about these many things.”
This turned me inwards for some introspection as I thought about my own life. As anyone who knows me can attest, I am someone who doesn’t know how to say no. Due to this, I often take on more than I can handle. In fact I was once given the award for Most Likely to Take on Too Much. As the days go by my responsibilities stack higher and higher as my constant need to please causes me to say yes. My friends call this a condition: the Sarah Jo-load. I constantly have something to do to the point where I feel like I am always one, two steps behind where I need to be. I feel like I am in a never-ending game of catchup. If I am not in class, I am working; if I am not working, I am doing homework; If I am not doing homework, I am at the gym or eating. And those rare occasions, I get to sleep. This constant go-go is probably the only reason why I am still moving (Newton’s First Law).
Why am I and thousands of other college students taking on so much? “I see the benefits in seeing every opportunity and I don’t see which if one outweighs the other so I kinda do it all,” says McGinnis.
And I think part of the reason why I continue to take on too much, is that there is a slight satisfaction and achievement in knowing that I can do it. It’s a source of pride for me that I can still maintain good grades and still show up to work and still have a decent social life, despite my constant anxiety. I can have my cake and eat it too and all that. But at what cost?
Thomas Curran, a prominent psychologist that focuses on perfectionism in the western world, thinks this generation is so focussed on taking on so much in part because of increased standards for college acceptances and jobs after college, but also a large shift in ideology at the societal level. Many point fingers are social media for pushing people to broadcast a perfect image. Instagram is especially intense as its a breeding ground for comparisons which can be harmful because “because in order for us to compete, we need to know where we stand, and to know where we stand, we need to know our attributes,” Curran said. “That tends to breed a lot of social anxiety, upward social comparison, and we, as a consequence, worry about how we look to other people.” And as this need of perfection continues, studies have shown that depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts have increased as a result. This need to project and have the perfect life leads to the now common phrase of Millennial burnout and the huge mental health crisis of todays’ society.
So how can you avoid this millennial burnout and improve your mental health?
Just recently, I had to confront my own burnout and recognize where I need to take a step back
I finally had to quit something. But as a yes-girl, I loathe to disappoint. I forced myself to do it anyways, after 21 years of taking on more than I can handle. So I quit one of my five jobs and let go of another stressful part of my life and finally allowed myself freedom that I never knew I could have. Although I am still stressed, I feel relieved that I have one less responsibility on my plate. I hated letting down my boss but ultimately I needed to realize that my own mental state is more important.
So I implore all of you to take a moment, breathe, and ask yourself: Why? Am I actually enjoying all the things I do or am I just trying to look impressive? Is there something here that I don’t need? What do I really want to do? Hopefully you’ll find that breath of relief 🙂
