{"id":5147,"date":"2020-02-21T17:00:28","date_gmt":"2020-02-21T22:00:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bracketyackrc.wpengine.com\/?p=5147"},"modified":"2020-02-21T17:00:28","modified_gmt":"2020-02-21T22:00:28","slug":"puns","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/?p=5147","title":{"rendered":"Puns"},"content":{"rendered":"

Written by Zachary Dalton<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cI see,\u201d said the blind man<\/span><\/p>\n

As he picked up his hammer<\/span><\/p>\n

And saw.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The Mid-Western short man looked up<\/span><\/p>\n

At the giant West Coaster<\/span><\/p>\n

Then said, \u201cUtah.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Two fish sit in a tank,<\/span><\/p>\n

One turns to the other and says,<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou know how to drive this thing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When a telephone wants to propose<\/span><\/p>\n

To a cell phone<\/span><\/p>\n

It gives it a ring.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

When a musical quartet meets<\/span><\/p>\n

At dinner to talk you call that<\/span><\/p>\n

A round table discussion.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The European man runs<\/span><\/p>\n

Through the town to get to work;<\/span><\/p>\n

He\u2019s Russian.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I threw dairy out<\/span><\/p>\n

From the window;<\/span><\/p>\n

I wanted to see a butterfly.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I\u2019d tell you more puns<\/span><\/p>\n

With clocks and watches,<\/span><\/p>\n

But I don\u2019t think I have the time.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Written by Zachary Dalton \u201cI see,\u201d said the blind man As he picked up his hammer And saw.   The Mid-Western short man looked up At the giant West Coaster Then said, \u201cUtah.\u201d   Two fish sit in a tank, One turns to the other and says, \u201cYou know how to drive this thing?\u201d  …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":5148,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5147","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opinion"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5147","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5147"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5147\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5148"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5147"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5147"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5147"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}