{"id":4312,"date":"2019-02-27T20:34:17","date_gmt":"2019-02-28T01:34:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.pages.roanoke.edu\/?p=4312"},"modified":"2019-02-27T20:34:17","modified_gmt":"2019-02-28T01:34:17","slug":"bros-before-babes-because-the-lads-are-chill","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/?p=4312","title":{"rendered":"Bros Before Babes Because The Lads Are Chill"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: left\"><em>Written by Zoe Manoukian<\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">American football players were recently overheard talking about Valentine\u2019s Day in a Roanoke College locker room.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u201cYou know what blows, man? There\u2019s Valentine\u2019s Day for all the couples, and there\u2019s Galentine\u2019s Day for all the girls. But there\u2019s nothing for us!\u201d Said one athlete. \u201cYeah man, you\u2019re right! Guys like us never get to do anything fun anymore without either getting in trouble or being called boners!\u201d Affirmed another. <\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u201cLet\u2019s change that. This year, everything\u2019s gonna be different,\u201d a third shouted over the rattle of a protein shake in the making. <\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400\">I got the honor and privilege to sit down with the former to discuss their evening after the fact. <\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u201cIt was actually pretty nice. We went to Hooters to start and ranked the waitresses, which is always a fun thing to do with the guys. We went out for drinks later on, for a few beers\u2014 no one got any fruity girly junk. And then we all came back to mine and watched <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Titanic<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">, but that\u2019s just \u2018cus nothing else was on TV. We would never pick that on our own and it\u2019s not like we cried or something if that\u2019s what you\u2019re thinking. We tried to talk about our feelings when it was over, and&#8230;\u201d, I could sense this Brad &amp; Chad becoming vulnerable. \u201cAnd nothing. We remembered that\u2019s dumb and talked about football again. Male-entine\u2019s Day was really just one sausage fest, alright? It wasn\u2019t gay or something.\u201d <\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Meanwhile, a local gay and local lesbian couple took the night for a double date and affirm that despite the 1:1 male: female ratio, dull dinner conversation, and pass\u00e9 outfit selection, nothing about the evening was \u201cat all straight.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Written by Zoe Manoukian American football players were recently overheard talking about Valentine\u2019s Day in a Roanoke College locker room. \u201cYou know what blows, man? There\u2019s Valentine\u2019s Day for all the couples, and there\u2019s Galentine\u2019s Day for all the girls. But there\u2019s nothing for us!\u201d Said one athlete. \u201cYeah man, you\u2019re right! Guys like us&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4310,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4312","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opinion"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4312","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4312"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4312\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4310"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4312"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4312"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4312"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}