{"id":4063,"date":"2018-11-09T22:38:46","date_gmt":"2018-11-10T03:38:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.pages.roanoke.edu\/?p=4063"},"modified":"2018-11-09T22:38:46","modified_gmt":"2018-11-10T03:38:46","slug":"the-swipe-out-lets-get-this-bread","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/?p=4063","title":{"rendered":"The Swipe Out: Let’s Get This Bread"},"content":{"rendered":"

Written by Shamira James<\/em><\/p>\n

Sometimes when things fall flat, it\u2019s good to have a backup plan. You know: the backup plan, the fallback, the next best thing, the anything-but-plan-a. Not only is it a valuable life lesson, but it\u2019s a good way to navigate through life. <\/span><\/p>\n

When the commons main dish isn\u2019t looking too hot but you\u2019ve eaten cavern way too many times this week, don\u2019t worry. You\u2019re not doomed to eating whatever braised meat is the option tonight; you got options kids.<\/span><\/p>\n

The first option is the pizza station. It\u2019s easy and consistent, one cheese pizza, one pepperoni pizza and one speciality pizza that may or may not be whatever was for dinner the night before. Sometimes they even switch it up throw in a flatbread and things go from okay to gourmet! There\u2019s cereal station, which always holds a special place in my heart. Cereal is quite literally the most underrated thing to eat. You never really realize the joy it brings you until your bowl-to-face slurping milk and rocking that milk mustache.There\u2019s the salad station for all the skinnty queens and all my thicc legends when we wanna see how the other half lives. Don\u2019t listen to people when they say \u2018\u201cit\u2019s not a salad if your drown it ranch!\u201d. If it\u2019s got the greens, that\u2019s good for me. Then finally, we have the end all be all of stations, the alpha and omega, the megalodon of the sea and of commons – THE SANDWICH STATION. Of course, while I love a good sammich, there are some grievances I have with our beloved haven of secondary options.<\/span><\/p>\n

First off, whenever I hunker down to make a good cold cut for myself the last thing I want to see in the shiny red plastic bowl to my left are tortilla chips. Whenever, I look over and see those spotted things my heart aches. Don\u2019t get me wrong, when the time and place is right. I love them – but that\u2019s for queso, spinach dip or salsa, NOT SANDWICHES.<\/span><\/p>\n

Next, who do I have to ask for refrigerated mayonnaise? Like, am I experiencing the worst Mandela Effect \u00a0or isn\u2019t mayo supposed to be kept in the fridge? That\u2019s rhetorical, of course it is. Instead, we get this weird color-coded pump box of mayo and it\u2019s warm and creamy and BLEH – my stomach is curling just thinking about it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Also, not to sound whiny (while I continue to whine) but it\u2019s literally in the most inconvenient location. On any given day, you have to press your pelvis against the bar to let others pass by. Pepper in the fact that no one uses manners anymore, it can truly be a nightmare for any jaded senior who will HONEST TO GOD STRONG ARM THE NEXT PERSON WHO DOESN\u2019T SAY EXCUSE I SWEAR.<\/span><\/p>\n

But, what\u2019s a girl to do? Beggars can\u2019t be choosers and I do appreciate that we have so many options. If all we had were whatever was served on the steam tables every night, there\u2019d be some night i\u2019d be eating the good ol\u2019 \u201cair pie and nothin\u2019 chops\u201d – Mama James. So here\u2019s me on my soapbox preaching to the masses once again, remember to be grateful. <\/span><\/p>\n

P.S. Is there a way to get Wonder Bread? It\u2019s truly the superior sandwich bread.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Written by Shamira James Sometimes when things fall flat, it\u2019s good to have a backup plan. You know: the backup plan, the fallback, the next best thing, the anything-but-plan-a. Not only is it a valuable life lesson, but it\u2019s a good way to navigate through life. When the commons main dish isn\u2019t looking too hot…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4064,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-culture-wellness"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4063","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4063"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4063\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4064"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4063"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4063"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brackety-ack.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4063"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}